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I don't know what it is with me, lately, but I've been really, really lonely.

I mean, "I'd give anything just to get a hug" and "Oh, Wstsonville wish I could wake up next to someone" and Lonely woman looking hot sex Watsonville watching a lot of bad movies and salivating over every semi-steamy scene" kind of hoy.

I've felt this way from time to time since Peter left, but these last few weeks it's been acute. Yesterday, I was listening to David, who has been such a chatterbox lately - he's gotten maddening, honestly.

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Like any kid with autism, he's got a lot of repetitive behaviors, and one of his is something they call echolalia. He repeats words and phrases over and over again, mostly because he really doesn't know what to say or how to say it.

Watsonvilke I can tune it out to a great extent because I'm so used to it, but when it gets to the point where I'm biting my lip to keep from telling him to hush up, you know it's bad. I finally turned to Anna and Swingers club Kailua1 "Your brother is making me crazy today!

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And then I started thinking. I keep imagining that at some point, all this will be done and I'll Lonely woman looking hot sex Watsonville dating and life will go merrily along. Lookiny truth is, though, that I'm not getting any younger, and at this rate, I'll be lucky if we finalize the divorce before I'm ninety.

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Then I get to date and hope some guy out there who likes a forty-something woman and can deal with my crazy-making chatterbox autistic boy, my overwhelming pile of debt, my trust issues and whatever else rears it's ugly head to make the process even more difficult. Of course, all that doesn't include any special issues my dream guy might have in tow, as well.

I know we all have baggage. That's life.

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But I feel like my baggage takes up freight cars, and not a lot of guys will want to cross those tracks. And it makes me feel even lonlier to think that way.

Sorry I'm a downer today. I just feel like it's all too much sometimes.

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